It is not false that yes, I enjoy my life and I try my best to do it to my full capacity. Like every human being I also feel disoriented at times. There are times when I feel life gets unfair like when I lost my grand maa in 2011. I sobbed uncontrollably. And also in difficult times when my optimistic self was threatened and I resorted to prayers.
But in a general, usual way I am hopeful, positive and I do enjoy my life.
How do I do this? Is my life different from others? Maybe yes. Because I have chosen to make it different. I have made the choices that have made my life convenient to me.
My friends usually use the word zest for me. And I believe this zest comes to me naturally, as I am an Aries. So I have an advantage there. I am born energetic and born positive. I simply can not sulk.
But beyond this energy and positivity, what I am today is consciously and carefully crafted by me (with support of family and friends) over the years that have taken me through various ups and downs.
I have had a failed relationships. Not sure if I mentioned it on the blog earlier but yes, it was a failed, bad relationship. It was a traumatic time for me.
I struggled hard in my career. I studied from a local, private engineering college and hence faced hurdles in getting my first job. When I finally got it at Infosys, I struggled there to continue with it since I hated coding.
Then there were stressful days when my family tried everything to get me married but I simply couldn’t say yes to anyone and things got really bad between me and my father.
So basically I have lived a life we all live. Ups and downs, good times and bad times.
But my story takes a turn in the way I look upon these incidents.
During retrospection, I think of all these times as building blocks. I am glad I had that relationship because it taught me so many things and that is why I was able to make a wise decision (of marrying my husband) in marriage. Good that I worked in the IT for years even though I never liked it, I can now pursue my interest. Else without having experienced IT first hand, what if after marriage I was craving to work there? (it would have been terrible, if I imagine it). Work life balance is so difficult to achieve in corporate jobs.
All these incidents, all those people who were mean to me in one way or the other, have taught me a lesson or two about life.
And I try my best to impart this knowledge, that is accumulated through these lessons, to you all through this blog.
How do I manage to stay positive when bad things have happened to me?
First, I know and I know it very well that I want to live. I do not want to die. I have dreams and I want to follow thy dreams.
Second, I want to live happily. I do not have a choice here. I have to stay happy else I get restless and I can not do anything, nothing at all.
So what does one do in such a case?
Find the best in everything. Forget and forgive and get rid of the grudge.
Even in negative situations, I try to look for the best for me. Ofcourse, when such things happened, I was upset. I have cried million times but just because I cry one day does not mean I keep crying everyday thinking about it.
I refuse to become a puppet of sadness. I have made smiling an integral part of my life.
I understand life is not in my control. But unless a loved one is taken away (something I can not reverse or repair in anyway), I think I will keep finding the good in whatever life brings to me.
This, according to me, is the best solution to keep up the spirits while playing the game called LIFE.
So smile. A smile is all it takes.